Mouse's Ear Memoirs: On Settling

Here is my Mouse's Ear settlement from the NLRB. It's not an impressive dollar amount. The NLRB calculates my back pay settlements this way:

I report a certain income number to the IRS. The IRS makes me give them a percentage of my self-reported income. I am misclassified as “self-employed,” so I have to pay the IRS, rather than receiving a return check. The more self-employed money that I report to the IRS, the more money I have to pay to the IRS, so that illegal aliens from Latin America can have free healthcare and free college tuition. Paying the IRS my stripper money is very important, for funding public school programs about gender reassignment and critical race theory. The IRS needs my stripper money for Ukraine, obviously, and I am more than happy to give it to them for all these causes. I report this same self-employed income number to the NLRB, for consistency in reporting between the two government organizations. The NLRB has assured me that they don't communicate with the IRS to check for consistency in reporting, but I do not trust what the government tells me, even if it's the NLRB telling me. So, I like to maintain consistency when reporting income. From this self-reported income number, the NLRB calculates how much money I would have made working at the club from the time I was fired, until settlement is reached. The Brownings were happy to settle for the calculation that the NLRB pitched to them.

My NLRB back pay from Mouse's Ear was even smaller, because the club shut down for a while during COVID. During the COVID shut downs, clubs that got sued for back pay did not have to pay their illegally fired employees for the time the club was shut down. For example, I know another dancer got illegally fired right before COVID. She successfully did an NLRB claim during COVID, and only got $500 in back pay. Her club was in California and closed for most of COVID.

Here is the private individual lawsuit settlement that Bradley Manewith and Adelaide Pagano helped me get. My check accounts for every unpaid hour, every house fee, every tip to staff, and every cut of every song. My lawyers negotiated the settlement to be up to $20,000, so that they could get paid for their time as well, without cutting into anything that I was owed. They get one third of that $20,000. Slimy loser lawyers try to take more than one third in their agreements, and I encourage all dancers to seek out lawyers with a 1/3 contingency agreement. It would have been nice to get punitive damages, but punitive damages are so difficult to prove. Making this wonderful series has alleviated some of my need for punitive damages. It took Buddy and Ralph a long time to go up to $20,000, but we got it, thanks to a commitment from my lawyers and myself to asking for more.

Maybe you are surprised that my settlements from Mouse's Ear didn't give me more money. I only worked there for six months, and I took a lot of time off for vacations. I kept track of every hour and dollar stolen from me, and got it all back. Dancers who work at clubs for three years, and who consistently go to work without taking a lot of time off, get a lot more money in their settlements. For example, I was a part of a class action with a dancer who received over $60,000 in her portion of our settlement. She worked at the same club for several years, and she was owed over $60,000. If I worked at Mouse's Ear for a full year, my settlement would've been around $40,000. Three years would've been around $120,000. A class action with multiple plaintiffs would've been in the millions, as is advertised in news articles about strip club class actions. My settlements are smaller, because I don't work at places for very long. Perhaps that is another reason why clubs try to fire me early on-- to avoid racking up debt they know they will pay back to me later.

Most of my settlement agreements do not allow me to publicly talk about how much I made. The original language in the Mouse's Ear settlement included a non-disclosure. I asked to remove the non-disclosure, because it's important to talk about publicly. Surprisingly, the Brownings agreed to remove it. Perhaps the Brownings didn't object, because they were selling the club to Deja Vu, and they didn't care about the consequences of dancers knowing how much I got in the settlements. Keeping my previous settlement amounts a secret has always been the club owner's decision. Sometimes I'm not even allowed to call them “settlements,” but “resolutions.” Sometimes I'm not allowed to talk about the settlements at all, with any language or acknowledgment that it's over. I always ask to take out as many of the non-disclosures as possible, because transparency is important to me.

Having my lifestyle requires a lot of money to be spent on things like hotels, vehicle maintenance, to-go food, relocation expenses, and vacation time off to heal from trauma. I get kind of nihilistic with my money saving habits. I question why I would want to save anything in a world that could end tomorrow, when I could take a vacation instead. I'm not sure why so many people want to sue me for writing truthful things about them on the internet, when they will get nothing out of it but legal bills. If Brittany Wood sued Mouse's Ear, she could've made over $100,000 with the amount of time that she worked there. Instead, she's thinking of suing me for including her in this wonderful series. People do the darnedest things.

I explained my financial situation to Elyssa Cabral around the time that I was fired. I told her about how poor I still am, even though I've sued all these clubs, about how expensive it is to live in hotels and move around, about how much of it is a vicious cycle, and even when I do get a regular job, fucking freaks are bothered that I won't let them sexually harass me or initiate a conversation with me about being a former stripper. One of the many irritating misconceptions about me is that I am rich, or that I do not struggle financially. I am bringing this up again, because NLRB attorney Katie Miller read my messages with Elyssa Cabral during the investigation, then reacted to them with me in her office. She was surprised to read the parts about my financial struggles. In the office with me, Katie Miller was like, “Really?” in a way that suggested she felt better about helping me if I was struggling. I was just sitting there in her office, thinking about how even if I did save my money properly and did not struggle, my NLRB claims would still be just as valid and Meritorious. The illegal termination, harassment, misclassification, and fucked up workplace would still warrant Meritorious claims. I'm not sure what business it is of Katie Miller's to be concerned with my financial situation and how much I am “getting” out of these lawsuits, except to calculate the correct amount according to my IRS numbers and “make whole” my situation. I'm not sure why I tend to understand legal interpretations more than actual lawyers. It was her job to investigate whether or not the claims were true, regardless of who I am as a person. Again, I thank myself for collecting so much evidence and advocating for myself, not Katie Miller.

Stupid Bitch Alex Cave has posted a variety of memes throughout this series over the past year, negatively shit posting about “never settling,” and negatively discussing settlements. Alex Cave is a stupid bitch in Knoxville who knows very little about fighting back or standing up for oneself with no support. She consistently harassed me in the workplace because I wouldn't give her more of my money, by body shaming me, calling me by my real name in front of customers, and encouraging other dancers to harass me. Alexandra Cave's life sucks so much more than mine, despite my struggles. So, she as a person does not care if I win or settle, and those shit posts were only made to belittle me and my decision to do so. I have discussed Settling Versus Going to Trial a number of times on this site already. I wish it didn't need to be revisited, but there wasn't much for me to gain by going to trial. The Brownings were willing to pay me every dollar I was owed, in addition to paying my lawyers for their time. The case was not a class action with other people depending on me. Settling is a personal decision, an emotional decision, and there's no shame in doing it. I have consoled other strippers on their sadness of settling, versus going for a big win. If other strippers who are experiencing turmoil or confusion on whether or not to settle, I invite you to contact me to discuss the risks and consequences of both decisions. Stupid Bitch Alex Cave, and people like her, are meaningless garbage in your lives. Stupid Bitch Alex Cave was always just a low-grade strip club manager harassing me for not submitting, and I reject everything that a dumb cunt like her stands for. Her ugly boyfriend looks like the fat balding leper from Braveheart.

It's interesting that she doesn't consider humping that guy a way of settling. She's going to school for journalism right now, but I can't imagine she will succeed in anything, what with her inability to recognize the Brownings for the garbage that they are.

Strip clubs will continue to misclassify, regardless of having to pay settlements or lose lawsuits. As stated before on this site, it is in their best economic interests to continue misclassifying, even if the occasional lawsuit comes up. They'll still save more money in the long run by misclassifying their employees. Strippers could maintain all of their scheduling and pricing freedoms while also being classified properly, if they unionized. Strip clubs are really good at making gullible dumb bitches across the nation think that they want to be contractors. I encourage all strippers to sue their clubs and get their money back, as a bare minimum to fight back. That tidy sum may not solve everything, but it will make you feel better to start a retirement account, make a down payment on a new home, or take an awesome cross-country road trip.